Unpredictability and uncertainty are two constants we can expect. In parenting, this is also true. Different situations happen day in and day out. Many of them are out of our control. Because of this reality, parents can experience high levels of stress. Often, it is impossible to physically step out and use more extensive tools to regulate our emotions or thoughts. Let’s look at two effective strategies that can help when you’re looking for immediate relief at that moment: Check-in and Mindfulness.
Check-In: This will allow you to pause wherever you are. Even when you are troubleshooting an incident, for example, a simple check-in can help. First and foremost, you must check and regulate your breathing. The breath is the first thing that changes when your body detects danger or threat. Your breath can be a source of comfort if you learn how to guide or regulate it. When you double the count for the exhale, your brain will pick it up as a signal that you are trying to restore calm. For instance, you can inhale for 4 counts through your nose and exhale 8 counts through your mouth. On the other hand, you will want to do equal counts on the inhale as it is on the exhale if you are looking to boost your energy. This means you might be feeling stuck and you need more clarity.
Mindfulness. This involves paying attention without judgment. There are many facets to mindfulness. Today is about increasing awareness of your body. Stress exists in this mind-body connection. Ignoring the body would only prolong the suffering and struggle. When you start to feel intense levels of stress, gently squeeze your left upper arm with your right hand. And then switch. This is another way to remind yourself that you are safe and in no immediate danger. Another mindfulness exercise you can do is to look around the room and pick an object that reminds you of feelings of “okayness” or neutrality. Soften your gaze at that object.
Try these tools and practice them for yourself. Notice any changes after consistently integrating them into your daily routines. Remember that you don’t need to wait until you’re experiencing high levels of stress. Even when you feel calm and relaxed, check in with your breath and be mindful of your environment.
About the author: Joy Acaso is our own Parenting Coach at Nightwatch Childcare Center. She has over 17 years of experience in the mental health field. She is available to answer your questions and provide resources that can help your family thrive.
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